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I am sick. No, not physically sick. Well, yes, maybe I am. For a year now I have been on a quest to reduce, declutter and minimalize pretty much everything in my life. It is not an easy project. It is exhausting. It is overwhelming. It is never-ending. This is why I am sick. I think you might be sick too.
Is it possible you, like me, have become overwhelmed with possessions? You don’t even know when it happened. It is almost like an army of ants invade your home each night and deposit more items in your house. I mean it could happen this way, right? Those ants are amazing.
Sadly, though it is us, the inhabitants of the home which brought the items in.
I want to blame my parents and in-laws and even my grandparents for embedding this deep belief we need all these things. I am sure it is their depression era lives which influenced our behavior. It probably did. However, they didn’t carry all these things into my house. Just multiple birthday and Christmas presents for everyone. I mean what were they thinking, expressing love for us in such an extravagant way? How dare they sacrifice their money to buy us lovely things. No, I can’t blame them, even though they were an influence.
I could blame the 80’s affluent propaganda I was imprinted with during my “impressionable” years. No doubt I fell under the spell of Michael J. Fox as Alex in “Family Ties” more than the hipster views of his parents.
I could blame the children. Yes, with each child comes so much stuff! Not just the baby gear but the toys and the clothes. Not just any old toys either. Barbies! With all their Barbie accessories. If you have had a girl, you know what I am talking about. Nothing hurts like stepping on Barbie’s high heels in the middle of the night. Unless, of course, you step on Legos!!! Those little burgers really hurt and all four of the children, boys and girls played with them. The boys, though, well they certainly left them laying around more.
Once again though, it is not the children. Who let them think they could get and keep so much? Who let them tie sentimentality to every gift given to them? Who took a bazillion pictures of them? Who saved hundreds of their school projects? Who was too busy feeding them and chasing after them to declutter on a more regular basis?
This is why I am sick. It was me.
The realization that I have failed as a gatekeeper in allowing so much to come into our home has made me sick.
The fact that I failed to swing the gate outward more often in sending stuff away has also made me sick.
The truth I have attached sentimentality to so many items has really made me sick.
I live in Houston where so many lost all their physical possessions in the floodwaters of Hurricane Harvey. I know how quickly material possessions can be lost and how immaterial they really are.
I have been to Haiti. I have seen how little you need to live a happy life.
I have mentored children who are happy despite the poverty they live in.
So, what am I do to about this illness? This “Affluenza”? As diagnosed by the authors of the book by the same name. In their words, I have “a painful, contagious, socially transmitted condition of overload, debt, anxiety, and waste resulting from the dogged pursuit of more.” Okay, I don’t have a big debt issue, but overload and waste, yes. Exhaustion and anxiety, absolutely.
I begin each day a new to conquer this illness. Every day I make decisions to stop the influx and increase the outgo.
It is a slow process. If you have seen any of the “Tidying Up with Marie Kondo” episodes on Netflix I hope you noticed that their cluttered houses were not cleaned up in one setting. It takes those families weeks, even months to undo what has taken years to accumulate. I am glad I watched a few episodes because when I read her book “The Magic of Tidying Up” a few years ago I got the impression I needed to achieve this in a weekend.
I keep reminding myself how real influenza is all consuming at first, then fades some. Followed by the fatigue of it all which lingers for quite some time while your body tries to recover from the storm it just endured. So it is with downsizing.
I begin again each time I take another box from the garage and make decisions about its contents.
I begin every time I carefully choose gifts for my millennial children.
I begin each time I put the adorable gift for my granddaughter back on the store shelf.
I begin each time my husband and I eat daily off of our wedding china. Food really does taste better on fine china, by the way.
I begin again each time I wash said fine china in the dishwasher, throwing caution to the wind. If that silver lining comes off, well then it served its purpose. Besides, the children don’t want it.
I am determined to be done with this illness.
I no longer want to be sick because I have too much stuff to care for.
Too much stuff to store.
Too much stuff to remember I have it when I am at the store and pick up a duplicate.
Too much stuff when there are so many without.
It is a new beginning every day, but I am up for the challenge.
I will not give up.
I think I am beginning to feel better already.
How about you? Are you sick of all the clutter in your home? Do you wish you had more space, more time and more money?
Do you wish your children were not so materialistic?
Maybe it’s time to join me in overcoming your affluenza.
As Joshua Becker in “The Minimalist Home” puts it, “The first step to crafting the life you want is to get rid of everything you don’t.”
What is it in your home or life which is making you sick? Comment below and let us know.
Let’s get well together.
